Commuters get to work quicker than usual by walking along the tracks

RAIL victims have had a more efficient journey to work than normal by just walking along the tracks.

The latest mess saw thousands of workers walk for hours along the railway line into central London and confirm it was immeasurably more enjoyable than their typical commute.

Jane Thomson, from Oxted, said: “I stumbled into work only a little bit dehydrated and traumatised. It was excellent.”

Makeshift trackside cafes and shops sprung up, causing many to abandon their jobs in the city and become a barista just outside Surbiton or an artisanal baker in Earlsfield.

Thomson added: “If it stays this way, in 20 years Woking station will be a fairy tale parents tell their kids to scare them away from infrastructure deregulation.”