THE Daily Mail has now decided that holidays are decadent, Marxist and homosexual.
The nation’s conscience has urged its readers to spy on their neighbours and report them if they leave the house carrying a bag.
Launching its ‘Holidays are Foreign’ campaign, the Mail said: “If you are on holiday you are, by definition, not standing guard over our cherished freedoms. Therefore, when you return from holiday the Post Office will be a crazy Muslim.
“Also, if you are on holiday you are unable to deal with the Constant Massive Emergency.”