DO you need statues, flags and Empires to be an interesting person or can you do it all by yourself? Find out:
How do you feel about Winston Churchill?
A) An absolute hero. I love and respect him more than my own grandad, and act like he was the one who gave me birthday card with a fiver in it every year.
B) Given that he’s a historical figure I don’t have any feelings about him. I have some thoughts, but that’s a different thing.
Do you think you are inherently superior because you were born in Britain?
A) Yes. I am part of a long line of special Brits like Shakespeare, Nelson and Cromwell. I mean, I’m not related to any of them as I come from peasant stock but that doesn’t stop me being totally amazing by having heard of them.
B) No, it’s just a geographical coincidence. To be honest, I’d rather have been born somewhere it doesn’t piss with rain all the time.
Are statues of vital importance to your identity?
A) I never gave statues a second thought until the Daily Telegraph told me too but now they are top of the list of things that make me who I am.
B) Do garden gnomes count? I’ve got quite a large collection.
Does the Union Jack flag make you feel all funny in the groin area?
A) Phwoar, yes, that random selection of colours and shapes is the most beautiful thing in the world.
B) It did when Geri Halliwell wore one at the Brits that time, but that’s about it.
ANSWERS
Mostly As: You are relying too heavily on the deeds of old, dead people for your sense of self. Try finding a personality elsewhere, for example through getting obsessed with metal detecting.
Mostly Bs: You have developed your own personality, but it largely revolves around being a self-satisfied, elitist leftie. Try being less smug, you might make some friends.
