A MIDDLE-CLASS couple spent a day out loudly asking their children whether they needed a wee or a poo in front of other people.
Martin Bishop and wife Francesca had taken their offspring Milo and Jasmine to a local museum clearly full of other families, yet seemed to think they were speaking within the privacy of their own home.
Onlooker Mary Fisher said: “I know kids have little control over these things but I’d quite like to be able to look at a dinosaur skeleton without the mental image of turds in my head.
“My kids just tell me discreetly if they need the loo, so I don’t understand why these people need to turn it into a public broadcast. The least they could do is lower their loud, annoying, middle-class voices.
“Hopefully constantly talking about their bodily functions in public will make the kids run up massive therapy bills for the parents in the future.”
However Martin Bishop said: “It’s good to be open about these things. That’s why we talked incessantly about ‘number ones and twos’ in the cafeteria.
“The man eating a sausage sandwich next to us didn’t mind, in fact he gave us a big smile. Or it might have been a nauseated grimace.”