Five-year-olds go on utterly pathetic school trip

A CLASS of five-year-olds have been taken on a pitiful school trip that really was not worth the effort.

The children boarded a coach carrying their labelled lunch boxes and travelled a short distance to a local wool museum that left none of them full of excitement.

Father Tom Booker said: “The wool museum? Jesus. That’s the sort of place I take them on Saturdays when I need to be somewhere quiet because I’ve got a hangover.

“There’s some sort of loom and loads of bobbins. Christ knows why you’d be interested in those. Plus it’s only a mile away. I had to fill in a permission slip and send in cash in an envelope for that?

“My son Noah didn’t even mention he’d been there, and normally he bores us shitless with every minor thing that happens at school, like seeing a particularly large bird in the playground.

“Maybe we need to send him to a better school where they’d take him to see a plastic dinosaur.”

Teacher Miss Kramer said: “During the three-minute journey two children pissed themselves and one was sick everywhere. That’s why we can’t have more ambition.”

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