Friday booked off by devious little shits

PEOPLE who booked Friday off work are cackling like maniacs at the success of their scheme.

The devious, probably evil individuals submitted holiday forms months ago with the seemingly innocuous request of ‘the second last Friday in August’ before anyone else had even thought of it.

Office administrator Jane Thomson said: “I don’t think my line manager even realised that Monday was a bank holiday.

“She was like, ‘doing something nice?’ I said I just wanted to clear out my garage and maybe take some stuff to the tip.

“Now I have four whole days stretching out in front of me. I could pretty much go to India if I wanted, or have a rites-of-passage summer adventure like in a Stephen King book.

“All those poor saps are toiling away. I am so much better than them.”

Thomson’s colleague Stephen Malley said: “We can’t help feeling betrayed on some level. She’s obviously not a person you can trust.

“In fact I hope she dies over the weekend.”