Libraries have terrible business model, says government

LIBRARIES are never going to make money if they dish out books for free, the government has claimed.

New research found that the average user spend per library visit is nothing, prompting ministers to question the validity of the business model.

A government spokesman said: “They deserve to be shut down if they insist on letting people take books, read them and bring them back.

“Libraries should be more like Amazon or Waterstone’s, where you pay a sum of cash for the book then keep it.

“But it appears that every library in history has functioned this way, even the Great Library of Alexandria built in 300 BC was a total failure if you look at revenues.

“It’s like librarians are some sort of communists.”

Librarian Mary Fisher said: “To turn a profit we’d probably need to charge overdue fees of about £1000 per day, which is quite a hike from 2p.”