Local twats pissed off with other local twats

A GROUP of local twats is pissed off with a different group of twats, it has been confirmed.

Twats that live in some expensive houses near a pub are annoyed with the twats that drink there and make a lot of noise when leaving.

Twat Norman Steele said: “It is ridiculous that these people can’t just enjoy themselves in absolute silence. Why does their revelry have to be so conspicuous?

“I pay a fortune to live next to a nice pub and I don’t want to have to hear people having a good time.”

Opposing twat Tom Logan said: “Don’t live next to a pub if you don’t want noise, that’s what I say all the time.

” If me and my friends want to drink six pints of Carling, loudly start talking about how 90s cartoons were amazing and then sing Ocean Colour Scene’s The Day We Caught The Train at 1am, why shouldn’t we?”

The two groups are now seeking arbitration by a third group of twats who work for the local council.