Friday, 6th December 2019

Man about to try and use his friend's shower

A 31-YEAR-OLD man is about to try and fail to use his friend’s puzzling shower system, it has been confirmed.

Tom Logan wanted to hose off the detritus he had accumulated overnight while sleeping on his friend’s sofa bed and mistakenly decided that their shower would be an easy way to do this.

He said: “What could go wrong? All I have to do is strip off and then get my head around an unfamiliar piece of plumbing while I’m naked and shivering.

“I’ve used both manual and thermostatic shower valves in my time, so I reckon I’ll be okay with whichever system my friend has installed.

“How the f*ck does this work?”

Friend Nikki Hollis said: “I usually give guests ten minutes to flounder like a wounded animal struggling to escape a bear trap before I step in to help.

“See the pin between the taps? Pull that up and try again. Do you need me to come in and show you?”