Thursday, 29th October 2020

Man attempts playdate and f**ks it up

A MAN attempting to host a playdate without being aware of its highly complex social nuances has predictably f**ked it right up. 

Tom Booker invited two of his daughter’s friends and their parents around for a playdate without any knowledge of the etiquette involved.

Guest Joanna Kramer said: “First he didn’t apologise for what a mess the place was, and second the place was actually messy. That’s the two opening rules of playdates violated right there.

“When the older kids disappeared upstairs he didn’t shout ‘Alright up there?’ every five minutes to show he was still concerned about their wellbeing.

“And when he suggested putting a film on he didn’t say it in a hushed, guilty tone as if it was a special exception rather than standard child-silencing practice.

“Then he served pasta, not Margarita pizza with cherry tomatoes and cucumber sticks on the side to show that you know about vitamins. Which is the only meal allowable.”

Booker said: “Apparently I also made the mistake of, when asked ‘where’s your bin?’ of pointing out the bin, rather than taking the half-chewed breadstick and putting it in the bin. Strangers have seen our bin. My wife is mortified.”