A MAN is point-blank lying about being ‘London based’.
STEPHEN Malley claims on his Twitter page that he is based in both London and Swindon, despite having no address in the capital and not having been there since a trip to see The Lion King in 2011.
School friend Martin Bishop: “When I saw that he lived in both places I thought he must be raking it in. Then I spotting him working in a Wetherspoon in Swindon town centre and realised he was lying to look cool.”
Malley said: “As a part time graphic designer, you need people to know that you’re living in London. If I said I lived in Swindon, powerful people would probably think I use crayons to design flyers for dwarf-tossing competitions.
“It’s not dishonest. The important thing is that I want to live in London.”
Malley also claims to live in London on various dating websites. He added: “If I got a date in London I would probably get the Megabus up, it’s only a quid if you book it enough in advance.
“Then I’d have enough money left over to take her to one of those trendy Angus Steakhouse places that Londoners are into.”
