NANS have decided to stop being racist following the royal wedding, they have confirmed.
83-year-old caucasian grandmother Mary Fisher said: “We nans thought Meghan Markle looked very nice, even though she is clearly no virgin, and she seems like a decent enough person despite us scrutinising her every gesture in a hawk-like search for personality flaws.
“It is time for us nans to end our centuries-old campaign of moaning about ‘coloureds’. It is the beginning of a new era, where we don’t quietly tut whenever a black face appears on television or make comments like ‘they’ve even got them on Antiques Roadshow now’.
“Obviously we will need a new social group to persecute, we’ll discuss that at bingo next Tuesday.”
Fellow nan Susan Traherne said: “Beneath the skin we are all just human beings. However I did just make some scones from an Ainsley Harriott recipe and they were tough as buggery.”
Meanwhile grandfathers have confirmed they will remain in their sheds for the foreseeable future.