A NATIONWIDE personality study has found that only 0.4 per cent of the population is not obsessed with sofas and fighting.
Researchers found that nearly everyone in the UK has a serious character affliction that makes them difficult to be around because they are either dangerous or demented.
In London there are only four people who are not technically psychopaths either in terms of narcissism or doing violent things, while in Yorkshire that number drops to one.
Professor Henry Brubaker of the Institute for Studies said: “You could gather up all the people who don’t like needless aggression, Mail Online celebrity news or out-of-town retail parks and put them together in a small hamlet. Except they would soon meet a grisly end.
“The clear message is that anyone who is even self-aware enough to worry whether they are sane should leave immediately.
The survey found that people in the Forest of Dean are friendliest but only because they are trying to lure travellers into a trap.
Salesman Julian Cook said: “It depends what you call rational. I work all week at a job I hate so that I can buy ‘designer’ shirts to wear for extreme violence on Friday and Saturday. It’s a good system.”