SUCKER MCs and their lack of dope rhymes are responsible for the state of the world, it has emerged.
Researchers at the Institute of Studies found that lame-ass MCs and their wack lyrics are directly to blame for everything from the US election result to global warming.
Professor Henry Brubaker said: “If it wasn’t for these so-called rappers ruining it for the rest of us straight up Gs, then Trump would never have gotten into power and Britain would still be part of the EU.
“Toblerones would have stayed the same too.
“Bad things happen when fools can’t keep away from microphones.”
Sucker MC Nathan Muir said: “I resent the term ‘sucker MC’, preferring to call myself a ‘differently-abled MC’.
“I’m at least better than that bear who raps Ice Ice Baby on that yoghurt advert. Now he is a sucker MC, rapping for big yoghurt companies.
“I can’t imagine anyone is going to take his next album very seriously now that he’s done that.”