All dogs on dog Tinder

DOGS are using social media for no-strings hookups with other dogs, it has emerged. 

Experts believe that all dogs are using dog phone apps to meet fellows dogs for secret liaisons, often under their owners’ noses.

Stephen Malley, a golden retriever, said: “I use Doggr to meet other dogs who I might like to casually hump while I’m out and about.

“I’m in a committed relationship with a chew toy, but there’s such a thrill about meeting some anonymous dog in the park and just going at it in the bushes.

“I like to have my owner with me in my profile picture, because it shows I have a sensitive, affectionate side, and bitches love that.”

Nikki Hollis, a highland terrier, said: “I like Sniffr, because it matches me with other dogs whose anal glands I want to sniff. Which is all other dogs.”

Professor Henry Brubaker, of the Institute for Studies, said: “We believe users of Doggr only ever swipe right, whether they’re looking at a picture of a dog, an armchair, a human leg, or a cat.

“We have also identified dog Uber, which involves lying down and whining until you’re picked up and carried home.”