PEOPLE who have not benefited from therapy insist it is something everybody should try, it has emerged.
Despite still being as anxious and paranoid as before, neurotic whingers who have been through therapy are convinced it is transformative and that even happy and well-adjusted people should give it a go.
Therapy attendee Jack Browne said: “Talking to a professional once a week has helped with my mood swings. I used to get them all the f**king time which pissed me off. Now they’re gone and I feel amazing!
“If you’re on the fence about it, try a consultation session and see how you go. It’s totally chill. And if you don’t I’ll break your legs for being a stupid twat who doesn’t care about their mental wellbeing. How’s that for incentive?”
Over-thinker Emma Bradford said: “My therapist has turned my life around. Or have they? Maybe I would have made all these personal revelations by myself? Perhaps it’s all a load of nonsense like astrology. Who knows.”
Counsellor Helen Archer said: “Therapy is absolutely something you should do, as a job. I make 50 quid an hour sitting on my arse. It’s easy money.”
