A BLACK Friday shopper has stopped hitting a pensioner in the face so she can just take in the atmosphere.
Still clutching her victim by the lapel, Jane Thompson paused and looked around with a sense of child-like wonder.
Thompson, 35 from Stevenage, said: “As Wordsworth wrote, ‘bliss was it in that dawn to be alive, but to be young was very heaven’.”
As her elderly prey struggled desperately to break free, Thompson added: “Look at all this passion. All these faces, so full of life.
“All around us heroes are emerging, epic tales are being forged in the white heat of Debenhams.
“Anyway, it was nice talking to you, but I do need to get back to punching the fuck out of this old man.”