A GROUP of senior Islamic clerics has written to Pope Benedict XVI calling for the world's two biggest faiths to find common cause over their obsessive hatred of gay people.
The Muslim leaders have appealed to Christians to join them in making increasingly bizarre and inflammatory claims about the nature of homosexuality.
The letter states: "Dear Pope – We hate the poofy men more than you. Yes? We think so, but maybe no. Why not we have coffee soon and be finding out?
"You say men with men is disease. We say it caused by devils. It is, how you say, 'potatoe – potahtoe'.
"We also want to tell you and all Christ followers – we love Creationism! Also, let's talk about women and how rubbish they are at everything."
The letter ends: "What world needs right now is much power to religious fundamentalisers. Yes? See you soon. Best regards, the Muslims."
Pope Benedict has yet to respond officially but Vatican sources said the Pontiff read the letter while nodding a lot, pointing to different paragraphs and shouting "yeah! yeah!".
Tom Logan, professor of theology at Glasgow Clyde University, said: "Some people may be wondering why this has taken so long, given that they're all out of their fucking minds in exactly the same way. Probably something to do with money."
The inter-faith project is expected to start with a seminar on the top ten ways to hurt yourself in the name of God.