EMPLOYEES who work from home have completely stripped off in order to stay cool in the heat.
Productivity among remote workers is higher than their office-based counterparts thanks to not wearing sweat-sodden suits and allowing cool air to breeze erotically through their armpits and genitals.
Homeworker Martin Bishop said: “Being naked is one of the many perks of working from home. Along with being able to get away with doing the bare minimum and pissing off Telegraph editors.
“If I was in the office I’d be leaving a sticky trail in my wake like a slug. And if I walked around without anything on you can bet HR would have something to say about it, even though I’m saving the company loads of money by not using a fan.
“But when I work from home I can whip everything off, chuck down a towel to soak up any residual back sweat, and happily toil away with the fan in my computer tower wafting a pleasant zephyr into my crotch.
“If I have to hop onto a video call I’ll chuck on a shirt but leave downstairs as nature intended. It’s just like the good old days of 2020 when everyone worked in a state of undress. Don’t pretend you didn’t.”
Bishop’s boss Nikki Hollis said: “I could have done without the horrifying mental image of Martin filling in spreadsheets with his clammy cock out.”