AN ACCOUNTANT, web designer or possible technical writer is trying to remember what the job that he used to do five days a week was.
Wayne Hayes, who was furloughed by ‘a man in a suit’ last month, knows his career used to involved turning on a computer but after that is going completely blank.
He continued: “I know for a fact there was an office I used to go to, but after that I’m hazy. There was a ping pong table but I don’t think that was my job.
“It feels important to remember because it’s Monday, even though I was up playing Skyrim until 3am last night which isn’t what I used to do on a Sunday night. Probably.
“God, I remember being shouted at by someone and then shouting at someone myself, all about a… annual report? Or was it an SEO campaign? Or a contract? It’s just… gone.”
Holding up a pair of football boots, Hayes continued: “I also have these special shoes and for some reason I think they’re to do with a man called Lee and Thursday nights.”