Office workers enjoy stressful, breakneck Friday lunch in pub

A GROUP of office workers spent 50 minutes anxiously waiting for a pub lunch then wolfed it down in 10 as their Friday ‘treat’.

Staff at Frinton Insurance in Cheam decided to have a break from their ‘boring’ canteen and instead subject themselves to a fraught, expensive ordeal which left all of them with indigestion.

Administrator Nathan Muir said: “We’d heard of other people going for a ‘pub lunch’, so we thought there’d be time. We were naive fools.

“The first pint was lovely, but after a ten-minute drive to get there I was gripped by a nagging fear that we needed to be ordering food immediately.

“By the time we did I was painfully aware that we had a mere 30 minutes to go if we were to get back in time, and the beer was curdling in my nervous stomach.

“As the clock ticked inexorably conversation faltered to nothing but ‘Where the fuck is our lunch?’ and ‘We should have gone to a carvery’.

“Finally it arrived and with 10 minutes to go I bolted down a roast with Yorkshire puddings, drove back to the office, slumped in my seat and spent the afternoon burping out my regrets.”