THE markets and Britain’s mood have been given a massive boost on discovering the arsehole who buggered up the NHS is back in government.
Following the sacking of Kwasi Kwarteng by Liz Truss for the idiotic mistake of being her chancellor, Jeremy Hunt has been given the post as reward for losing two leadership contests for being unpopular and crap.
A Conservative backbencher said: “Jeremy is a moderate and a safe pair of hands, as long as you don’t remember anything that he did between 2010 and 2019.
“Doctors won’t remember him fondly. Nor will nurses. His backing of Saudi Arabia’s war in Yemen may be a problem for some. Trying to hand Rupert Murdoch a broadcaster during a hacking scandal could be an issue for a prejudiced few.
“Even if you’ve not that much recall, his pissholes-in-halfwit-snow features, like a jack-in-the-box which yearns to be punched, will surely bring back feelings of rage. But he is the best person for the job. That’s where we are now.”
Joseph Turner of Braintree said: “Hunt? I f**king hate that prick. He’s one of the wankers responsible for the total state this country’s in.
“Still, we might get to hear journalists mispronounce his name in an amusingly obscene way. So there’s that.”
