A MAN has been bombarded with the phrase ‘levelling up’ so much he has no idea what the f**k it means anymore.
Martin Bishop thought it made sense when he first heard it but having witnessed it being applied to everything from more jobs in Doncaster to cheaper air travel is beginning to suspect it is probably bollocks.
Bishop said: “Levelling up sounds good at first, but you hear it every sodding day. It’s like repeating a normal word like ‘sandwich’ over and over until it sounds totally alien. Sand… which. It’s got nothing to do with sand.
“Or witches. How weird is that?
“When you think about levelling up for more than 10 seconds, it loses all meaning. It’s making things level, but also making them go up. Can you level things down? What things anyway?
“I no longer know if it’s much-needed investment in struggling areas or meaningless bullshit with no plan behind to it to make Red Wall voters kid themselves they didn’t just vote Tory because immigrants.
“Given that it’s the thatched blond man-child’s favourite phrase, I’m pretty sure it’s the latter.”