Saturday, 24th October 2020

Boy was on hospital floor because he wanted to get Brexit done, says Johnson

BORIS Johnson has claimed that the boy lying on a floor in A&E was doing it as a protest because he wants to get Brexit done.

Johnson, who asked to keep the phone he first saw the photo on yesterday as a memento, told Britain that Jack Williment-Barr was just trying to draw attention to the terrible plight of a country trapped in the EU.

He continued: “At first I was worried it was another one of my kids. I’m always being confronted with a photo of one or other of them, with some woman banging on about ‘neglect’.

“But no, Jack’s more like that Swedish girl, you know the one, stays off school to protest against Scandinavian socialism and pop music.

“This brave boy, who was suffering from suspected pneumonia due to the long-term effects of Jeremy Corbyn’s dithering, decided the only way to bring attention to his country’s predicament was to lie on the floor next to his perfectly clean, serviceable bed.

“It’s worked brilliantly. Thanks to him, the whole of the UK’s talking about how we urgently need to elect a Conservative government to pass my Brexit bill.

“I owe you a debt, Jack. If I win on Thursday, you can have a two-week course of amoxicillin on me.”