Saturday, 5th December 2020

Dom Cummings announces Lockdown 2 tour dates

DOMINIC Cummings has announced the dates of his forthcoming four-week Lockdown 2 tour of the UK. 

The prime minister’s special advisor has released dates, locations and branded merchandise for the highly-anticipated 26-date tour.

Tour manager Robert Jenrick said: “Lockdown’s back so Dom’s on the road.

“Beginning on Thursday with a London gig, he’s moving up the country to Durham for four nights headlining Barnard Castle and bluebell woods, with laser show.

“Then he’ll be testing his eyesight all the way up to Scotland, being clocked by the public in beauty spots in Lancashire, Wiltshire and the Cornish coast, before hopping into Wales and finally stopping for a slash against a tree near Belfast.

“Obviously he’ll have his family with him throughout. You can’t do a punishing schedule like this without a kid or two in the car.”

The Lockdown 2 Tour 2020 T-shirts and gilets will list all the locations where Dom can be seen on the rear, along with a quote from the police explaining there is insufficient evidence to investigate and the matter is considered closed.