I’m Churchill, says Boris

BORIS Johnson has just come straight out and confirmed that he is Winston Churchill. 

The former London mayor and foreign secretary has used his column in the Telegraph to assert that he is the legendary prime minister who led Britain through World War Two and he is ready to lead us once more. 

He continued: “Bald. Cigar. Bulldog face. When you look at me that is what you see, for I am Churchill. 

“I answered this country’s call in its time of need, when the cowardly appeaser Neville Chamberlain resigned, and ensured victory over the hated Hun, and that need has come again. 

“Now is not the time for questions, such as ‘Has he always been Churchill?’ or ‘Didn’t Churchill die in the 60s?’. Such questions are unhelpful and unpatriotic. 

“No, now is the time for Theresa May to resign and for me, Churchill, to take over and lead Britain to an unlikely but resounding victory.” 

Conservative voter Carolyn Ryan said: “When you’re already believing Brexit will be a brilliant success that everybody supports, this isn’t so much of a leap. He’s Churchill alright.”