Most Britons think 'The Good Friday Agreement' was presented by Chris Evans

TWO decades on from the Good Friday Agreement, most Britons think it was a telly programme with Chris Evans. 

A countrywide survey showed that 18 per cent believed it concerned Ireland, 22 per cent thought it recognised Boyzone’s win at Eurovision and 60 thought it was a telly programme where Chris Evans took the piss out of someone called Will.

Nathan Muir of Doncaster said: “I think the Good Friday Agreement was a landmark in history because of the way it combined improvised comic banter with high quality guests like Backstreet Boys and Kylie.

“I’m not getting it mixed up with The Big Breakfast, am I? That would be embarrassing.”

However mother-of-four Susan Traherne said: “I remember it was on a Friday, because Easter isn’t some years, is it? Tony Blair was very pleased. I think he needed the soldiers for Iraq.”

And Theresa May of central London said: “Literally never heard of it until really recently. Turns out it’s…complicated.”

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Woman's deeply spiritual lifestyle costs a f**king fortune

A WOMAN committed to finding a deeper meaning in life does so in extreme luxury with numerous trips to exotic places, it has emerged.

Investment banker Joanna Kramer only opts for mind-broadening experiences that are expensive and enjoyable, such as doing yoga on an idyllic beach in Thailand.

She said: “Spirituality requires effort. If you want to see the sun rise over a stunning mountain range you’ve got to book a luxury resort and get a four-hour flight to Marrakech.

“Even meditating at home needs the right environment, which I’ve created by building a massive conservatory that’s incredibly relaxing thanks to my Feng Shui consultant.

“The Japanese water features set me back £8,000, but it’s worth it to have a place where I can escape from the money-obsessed rat race.

“My most profound experience was swimming with dolphins in the Azores, and the five-star hotel was a great place to think about my life priorities over fresh seafood and cocktails.”

Kramer’s cleaner Mary Fisher said: “Apparently all this meditation helps re-balance her chakras after the weekly coke sessions with her rich city mates. It also makes me very mindful of how much I want to strangle her.”