By Abigail Pennson, our reasonable, plain-speaking middle-class columnist slightly to the right of Hitler
APPARENTLY 100,000 British do-gooders have offered their homes to Ukranians. Yeah, right. But it’s prompted me to step up and open my own home – to the cancelled.
The Ukranians? No friends of mine. Where were they during our illegal lockdowns? Where were they when Donald Trump was unfairly ousted from social media? Where were they when Jeremy Corbyn threatened our very way of life?
Anyone taking in a Ukranian family – they’re as genuine as Sylvanian Families, and five times the price – is a fool who deserves everything they get. When you’re busted because of an illegal cigarette-smuggling ring being run from your garden office, you’ll see no tears from me.
But in a way I owe them thanks. Because they have opened my eyes to another great injustice being meted out to the powerless. Another cohort of the suffering the bleeding hearts would never stoop to offering help.
I speak, of course, of the cancelled. Those millions who dared to speak honestly on social media. Those who had the courage to stand against the liberal Guardianista dictatorship. Those who, like the tank man in Tiananmen Square, defied our woke overlords.
Their reward? To be stripped of their very livelihoods. Katie Hopkins, JK Rowling, Chrissy Teigen, John Cleese and so many others.
Where is the national outpouring of sympathy for their ruined lives? When will the BBC show heart-rending clips of their worlds being destroyed just as surely as if hit by an Iskander-M ballistic missile?
No, they are not mourned. The human cost meted out on Ellen DeGeneres, Chris Pratt, Doja Cat and Lizzo cannot be counted. Like Putin’s propagandists, the progressives pretend no damage was caused and anyway they deserved it.
Well, allow me to announce that there is one woman who will not turn away. Sia, Armie Hammer, Letitia Wright and Roseanne Barr: the doors of my Chigwell townhouse stand open. There is safe haven here.
And will I be claiming my £350 a month? Too right I will. Why should the right-on brigade get all the government cheddar?