Friday, 4th December 2020

Audi driver speeding on M6 cites Lewis Hamilton as his inspiration

AN Audi driver going at 95mph in the outside lane of the M6 has admitted he would never have believed in himself if not for Lewis Hamilton. 

Jordan Gardner confessed that if it was not for the seven-time Formula One champion he may never have had the courage to push his Audi to the limit while weaving in and out of traffic and listening to Euphoria Classics at ear-splitting volume.

He continued: “Yeah, it was always my dream to not only drive fast but be obnoxious with it, ever since I was a little boy in the back of my dad’s Ford Granada.

“But I never thought it was possible until I saw Lewis on the telly and realised that like him I could follow my dream. He motivated me to borrow enough for a second-hand Audi, then borrow more for insurance.

“And from then it was just about abandoning my girlfriend and mates so I could spend every weekend revving it in the garage before bombing it up down the M6 every chance I get.

“Lewis and I have both achieved our lifelong goals. Yes, he’s a record-breaking multi-millionaire who dates some of the most attractive women in the world while being a hero to black children everywhere.

“But he hasn’t got an eight-way speaker system in his car pumping out Basshunter’s Now You’re Gone. So who’s the real winner here?”