Bigger Premier League clubs planning to bully Huddersfield

THE other Premier League teams are hatching a plot to bully newcomers Huddersfield throughout next season.

As Huddersfield celebrates winning the Championship play-offs, the managers of bigger clubs like Chelsea and Arsenal began coming up with humiliating ways to put the upstarts in their place.

Arsene Wenger said: “I always enjoy seeing fresh meat in the Premier League. I can’t wait for our game against Huddersfield next season so I can offer Wagner my hand but then retract it and make a loser sign on my forehead. 

“I say we make Huddersfield play their first game naked. We’ll tell them that all promoted teams have to do it as an initiation thing. 

“Better still maybe we’ll beat them 1-0 and have Per Mertesacker score the goal just to take the piss.”

Chelsea have already made plans to change ‘Huddersfield’ on the scoreboard at Stamford Bridge to ‘Uddersfield’ while Jose Mourinho is plotting to use his famed mind games to convince the Terriers that their game against Manchester United has been cancelled.

Huddersfield boss David Wagner said: “Jurgen Klopp is my friend, I just hope he doesn’t behave differently when he’s around the other big managers.

“I’m sure the referees will look after us, you’d never catch them siding with the bigger teams.”

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Corbyn is hopeless, says woman who can't remember her PIN number

A WOMAN who cannot remember a four-digit number is appalled that Jeremy Corbyn couldn’t immediately recall the cost of a childcare plan.

Emma Bradford, 35, listened to the Labour leader’s interview on Woman’s Hour and was shocked when Corbyn could not reel off the statistics of Labour’s new childcare policy.

Bradshaw, who was standing at a cashpoint looking confused, said: “I expect politicians to be perfect in every way, and Jeremy Corbyn has got more to prove than anyone, because he has an allotment and a beard.

“If he can’t remember one statistic amongst all of the other facts and figures he must be carrying around in his brain, how on earth can Labour be trusted with the economy?

“And no, I still can’t remember my PIN number. Although I’m fairly sure it starts with a five or a four.”

Bradford later called the person behind her in the queue for the cash point ‘an impatient cow bag’ when she got her PIN wrong for the third time in a row.