Monday, 8th March 2021

Manchester United nothing but bullies

THE Manchester United team who beat Southampton 9-0 yesterday are nothing but a bunch of nasty bullies, the Premier League has agreed. 

United racked up seven goals after their opponents had a man sent off in the second minute and a further two after a second Southampton player was shown a red card, which is basically cheating.

Football fan Nathan Muir said: “Those United players should be ashamed of themselves. Kicking a team when they’re down.

“Yes, they deserved the win, but there was no need to rub it in the way they did. That crossed the line from honest competition into abuse.

“For God’s sake, Southampton lost nine-nil to Leicester not two years ago. They’re only just getting over that trauma. How insensitive is it to come and do it again?

“I hope Manchester United woke up today appropriately remorseful for how they behaved. That Ole always seemed such a nice boy. I expect him to apologise and give four of the goals back.”

United manager Ole Gunnar Solskjaer said: “In the moment we got carried away and went too far, I realise that now. We promise not to score another goal for the rest of the season.”