Sherwood and Rodgers form crime fighting duo

TIM Sherwood and Brendan Rodgers will drive around the country solving mysteries, they confirmed yesterday.

The duo have launched a detective agency called ‘Rodwood’, promising to deliver their special brand of justice wherever they are needed.

Rodgers said: “Each week I will have three envelopes, one of which will contain the name of the criminal we’re after and the other two will have a series of excuses why we didn’t catch them.

“We’re hoping for a 61% conviction rate, which is enough to put you in the top four of crimefighting duos alongside your Dalziel & Pascoes and your Rosemary & Thymes.”

For their first case, a series of small bandstand fires in a Carlisle park, Rodgers has asked the local authority for a budget of sixty million pounds to assemble a team of promising young detectives from across Europe, as well as Joe Allen.

Sherwood said: “Tim Sherwood will get results because Tim Sherwood does not know the meaning of the word ‘failure’, despite the numerous chances Tim Sherwood has recently had to find out.”