Having decided to throw in the towel at Newsnight, I am looking forward to getting to go to bed at a decent hour, and possibly show my wife a good time in the process. My plan is to interrogate her vigorously and without mercy and then patronise her until she begs me to stop. Should I wear a suit?
I think my daddy will be sad that you are leaving Newsnight, as he is an avid watcher. My mummy says it’s a really boring programme and goes to bed when he puts it on. But I think she’s confused, because last time he was supposed to be watching it, I got out of bed and hid behind the sofa and there were two pretty ladies on the TV, and then a muscly man turned up with his shirt off who I think was a plumber. But I don’t know what happened next because my daddy saw me and sent me back to bed.
Hope that helps,