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Your astrological week ahead, with Psychic Bob

Leo (23 JUL-22 AUG)This week you learn that the difference between a strip club and a burlesque show is a juggler, an air of smugness and an extra £20 to get in. No chance of an oily tug for an extra 50, either.

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US unveils shiny new psychopath

This man is called Rick Perry and he believes Jesus will restore America’s AAA credit rating if they leave him a fish finger under a magical, upturned bucket.

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