What people say about your child and what they actually mean
YOUR children are just as awful as everyone else’s, whatever your friends may be saying to your face. Here’s how to decode the euphemisms they use to describe your offspring.
‘Lively’: dreadful little shit
‘Good talker’: Shut. The f*ck. Up.
‘Thinker’: kind of weird
‘Hilarious’: not remotely hilarious
‘Determined’: pathologically selfish
“Free spirit’: insane
‘Old soul’: creepy as f*ck
And remember ‘He/She looks just like you’ isn’t necessarily a compliment.