Don't worry, it's not the foundations for a huge death machine, says China

Massive thing visible on Google Earth is for watching videos and stuff, promises Beijing


Sign up now to get
The Daily Mash
free Headlines email – every weekday

Female orgasm far too complicated, say men

A VIDEO of the female brain during orgasm proves it is far too complicated to be bothered with.

The animated scan showed more than three areas of the brain were involved at different times, leading millions of men to shake their heads and say ‘nah’.

Researchers found that the orgasm starts in the frontal cortex before moving on to the nucleus accumbens and then reaching its peak in the hypothalmus, by which point a normal man should have finished and be well on his way to the lavatory.

Professor Henry Brubaker, of the Institute for Studies, said: “I completely lost track of it half way through. It was like watching a David Lynch film.

“How are we supposed to remember ‘nucleus accumbens’ never mind asking if her oxytocin has reached its optimum level?”

Stephen Malley, from Guildford, said: “Not that I care in the slightest, but if a woman really wants to have an orgasm with me then it’ll have to be a proper, old fashioned one with none of your fancy brain parts that are just there for show.”

Bill McKay, from Hatfield said: “I thought they had them in their vaginas? The same way that I have mine in my penis.

“If it can all be kept in the vagina area then I can probably cope with that, but if bits of it are going to be happening in her brain then I’m going to get all confused.

“And then eventually I’ll just give up and go and watch television.

“As usual.”