Brexit movie only going to be released on VHS

THE planned Brexit feature film will only be available on VHS, it has been announced.

Following reports that a Hollywood studio had bought the rights to Brexit, it was confirmed that the film will only appear on the home video format because Brexit enthusiasts dislike ‘new-fangled dee-vee-dees’.

The film, which will star John Cleese as Nigel Farage and Roger Daltry as the woman in Sunderland who celebrated by getting on someone’s shoulders, will not be released in cinemas because they are communal places where everyone is allowed in.

Wayne Hayes, producer of Brexit: The Quest for Freedom, said: “Surprisingly 86 per cent of Brexit voters still have a video recorder. They get masochistic pleasure from rewinding things.

“The film will cost £15, then if they complain about it being too expensive we’ll just casually say, ‘Is that a Polish food store on your local high street?’ and they’ll get why it’s so expensive and not ask any more questions.”

Hayes added: “It’s a story that must be told because Nigel Farage is one of the most important figures of his era. Like Nelson Mandela, except the opposite of Nelson Mandela in all respects.”