‘Bridgerton is my wife’s porn’, says man who has no f**king idea

A MAN who believes the romp-filled period drama Bridgerton is the closest his wife gets to pornography could not be more wrong. 

Joshua and Hannah Hudson have been married for eight years, during which he has erronerously imagined that her erotic fantasies are entirely based on scenes in bodice-ripping dramas or his own prowess as a lover.

He said: “She loves all that corset stuff, guys in frilly shirts politely asking women to dance then placing a hand on the small of her back as she climbs into a carriage. I don’t think she’s ever seen as much shagging as in Bridgerton. 

“Like all women, desire is all about personal connection and she’s not very visual in her tastes, so seeing a couple of hot actors bone by a lake has blown her mind.

“It’s great that there’s something softcore and accessible that she can get into. I’m hoping it’ll give our love life a bit of a boost.”

Hannah said: “Bridgerton made me uncomfortable. All that vanilla sex really drove home to me how depraved the shit I watch online is.

“I don’t want to go into detail. I don’t like thinking about it. Josh thinks there’s a tear in my eye because of the romance, but I’m just mourning the innocence I’ve lost to internet filth.”