A FANTASY author praised for his stunning worldbuilding just takes everyday words and spells them slightly differently, it has emerged.
Norman Steele, author of bestselling fantasy series The Swordingsong of Garr-Eth, has admitted that his books just take words like ‘priest’ and ‘wizard’, change them to ‘preist’ and ‘wyszard’ and the money rolls in.
He continued: “If you look closely, all of my characters are called normal names like Gary or Steve. But change it a little – spell it Garie or Sta’eve, for example – and everyone goes apeshit for it.
“My publisher says readers want to believe they’re not just reading the same old tired fantasy tropes. My solution? The same old fantasy tropes but I’ve spruced up the words a little. And I’m acclaimed for my groundbreaking originality.
“Tolkien had the One Ring, I have the Lone Hring. Narnia had the wardrobe, I have the Loft Between Worlds. It’s so f**king easy I still can’t quite believe it works.”
Steele is approaching the release of sixteenth novel in the series and has big plans for the grand finale. He said: “Jenni’fer and Richoord face off against the Despiser. Maybe destroying an artefact with the unexpected help of small, hairy, pure-hearted people.
“I’ll call them pygmlings, just to be on the safe side, and wait for the TV offers. If The Wheel of Time’s getting made, why not my shit?”