IS YOUR superiority to others based on not consuming the same media as them? Nathan Muir flaunts his iconoclastic ignorance of perfectly enjoyable things he hasn’t seen.
I’m told these are ‘fun’, if that’s what you look for in cinema. But I’ve noted there are lots of them, they’re popular and with their Hulks and Iron Men and Doctors Strange clearly unrealistic. You wouldn’t find mutants, gods and epic battles in the work of the Bard of Avon.
Apparently very funny. So not for me. I pay a BFI subscription and grimly labour through low-budget, rambling Brazilian indie films about HIV in the favelas. They’re more impressive to mention in conversation, even if no-one has come over for film night in 20 years.
It’s hard to be unaware of a cultural phenomenon like Star Wars, but I claim to be. Every time someone says ‘R2-D2’, ‘Chewbacca’ or ‘Maz Kanata’ I giggle at their absurdity. I feel this marks me out as a highly cultured intellectual and not just a massive cock.
Apart from the savage purity of early Felix the Cat, no. The Simpsons, Rick & Morty, South Park: all for children and safely dismissed as a genre because cartoons now are surely still rubbish like Penelope Pitstop from 1969.
I can’t just enjoy a well-made sci-fi horror film for straightforward entertainment and then watch a more weighty film on another occasion. That would be prostituting my exceptional intellect. It’s a shame because I’ve heard it’s rather good.
Any Tom Cruise films
Do you know how much f**king effort it’s been not watching a single Tom Cruise film in four f**king decades? I airily declared ‘No, I’ve never watched a Tom Cruise film and never will’ in 1993 because I didn’t think he’d last. He’s still bloody here. Now if you’ll excuse me, tonight’s double screener is The Hunger and The Hands of Orlac.