THE manager of a Swindon table dancing club last night offered members of the public the chance to express themselves on a plinth, especially if they have big tits.
Eddie Harris, owner and resident compere at Korky Katz, has created an 'interactive platform for creative expression for semi-attractive women under 35' who were unable to take part in Anthony Gormley's public art project.
Mr Harris said: "We don't actually have a plinth, but there is a shiny metal pole and a slightly raised area made from old pallets covered in chipboard.
"It's a unique artistic environment with plenty of chrome and smoked glass, while musical ambience is provided by our resident DJ Beefy playing a selection of 80s floorfillers and plenty of smooth R&B to promote pelvic grinding."
Mr Harris has recently completed an Arts Council grant application to fund his project, which he has entitled 'Friday Nite Hotness at Korky Katz with 2-for-1 on Metz'.
"I used the word 'facilitate' in every other sentence and assured them that while there will be lots of birds' tits and that, the whole thing will be steeped in irony. I'm hoping to get about six grand."
He added: "Basically, the 'living sculptures' can do whatever they want as long as it involves bare bums. But mind out for my terrier cross 'cause he does like to run onto the stage and start licking the performers' thighs.
"I've tried to stop him but he's a randy little bastard, and I can't bring myself to have his knackers off."