REMEMBER these rebellious songs that had you righteously aflame in your youth? How misguided they seem to older, wiser, middle-aged you.
Another Brick in the Wall (Part 2) by Pink Floyd
Teachers – who are sadist perverts – turn pupils into mindless, conformist zombies. Or, looking back, they did their best with Richard III and wanted you to go to university. Pink Floyd made more sense when you were shitting yourself about not revising for A-level maths.
Killing in the Name by Rage Against the Machine
Pointing out racism and hypocrisy are bad doesn’t feel like as urgent and necessary now. Also, ‘F**k you, I won’t do what you tell me’ is not a phrase you can ever use unless you want a written warning, to be ejected from Nando’s or to be a truly terrible spouse.
All You Need Is Love by The Beatles
As your many failed relationships can attest, you need a bunch of other stuff, including but not limited to: money, vaguely interesting conversation, high standards of personal hygiene, the ability to read minds and, most importantly, a car.
Anarchy in the UK by The Sex Pistols
Smashing everything without a plan in place is a really bad idea. Weirdly you learned this from Brexit. So well done, Leavers, for having a grasp of international economies less sophisticated than a sneering teenager who performed while being gobbed on.
I’m Waiting for the Man by The Velvet Underground
Lou Reed’s New York drug subculture sounded romantic and exciting. Nowadays you realise it combined heroin withdrawal with waiting for a commuter train that might not show up, eg Southern Rail. You’re not totally square yet though. You’d try opiates if you could get them safely and reliably from Ocado.
F**k Tha Police by NWA
Dr Dre, Ice Cube and Eazy-E were right to distrust the cops. But in fairness, they turned up quickly when your shed got broken into, and it’s lucky someone’s there to investigate dead bodies because you’d probably be sick. And you’re prepared to bet when Beats headphones are getting shoplifted Dre isn’t calling the Crips.
