Superhero, WW2, Shouting: The six movie genres for men

MEN are more discerning filmgoers than women, demanding only the most thought-provoking explosions and car chases. Here are the definitely-not-predictable ways Hollywood thinks it can grab you.


Fine for adults as superhero movies now are grittier and darker. Literally. Sometimes you can’t see a f**cking thing. But you can hear about how Superman ‘can’t save everyone’. Luckily there’s still Gal Gadot looking nice if you didn’t pay 14 quid for a lesson in basic moral philosophy.


From hitmen to sci-fi, guns films come in many different flavours. But all are extremely realistic. Bullets can be flying everywhere, but the hero is thankfully safe due to crouching behind a wooden crate and wearing effective plot armour. Will he survive to win the love of Lady in Tight Vest, or will a stray .45 calibre round cut him in half like in real life? Who knows? It’s so exciting.

World War 2

Not to be confused with guns, World War 2 lets you learn about history, although films like Fury suggest historical accuracy has dropped somewhat since epics like A Bridge Too Far. Still, it’s an important topic. The Nazis did some terrible things we must never forget, like trying to hang Indiana Jones because he’d got the time-travel dial of Archimedes.


Often the result of a 40-something’s bid for the Best Actor Oscar – and his chances go up with every banged table, thrown glass and fleck of spit hurtling toward his co-stars. Or sometimes it’s the result of a film being heavily action-oriented, so every line of dialogue is ‘Get down!’, ‘Three minutes and the whole place blows!’ and ‘Drive!’. Gripping.


You might not be a stereotypical man. You might be an individual, as proven by your tote bag and painted fingernails all the other individuals have. Try a subtitles film. Chinese villagers worrying about their goat is really interesting, honestly. Also quite a few are just eyeball-ripping horror films, but they’re artistic because they’re in Dutch.

Quentin Tarantino

Whatever he shits out next. Sometimes he doesn’t even bother making a proper movie, just copies bits of Bruce Lee films and 70s exploitation toss. He’s a genius.

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Is your girlfriend faking her orgasms? Take our fun quiz

ARE you a legend in the bedroom or – implausible as it sounds – could she be faking it? Find out by taking our quiz.

Who usually initiates sex?

A) Her. A lot. My penis is being worn down to a stump and it’s really knackering. But I guess I’ll just have to live with it, as I point out frequently with annoying false modesty.

B) Me. Generally unsuccessfully, but that’s only because my partner gets a lot of headaches. Sometimes as many as seven a week and two extra ones on weekend mornings.

How long does she take to climax?

A) A good 20 minutes or so, but when she does it’s actually quite impressive. It’s like the sex scenes in Showgirls, but not painfully embarrassing.

B) Always within five minutes. Which is fine by me, because that’s my limit before crashing my own custard truck. I guess I’m just so good she can’t control herself.

Is she vocal?

A) Strictly at the point of orgasm, but then she really lets rip. And sometimes in the heat of climax she gets my name wrong, but that’s understandable. I suppose Gary does sound very similar to Antonio.

B) Very. She screams constantly during sex like Ingrid Pitt in a vampire film. There’s no way a woman could fake that. 

What does she do immediately afterwards?

A) She lies there for ages bathing in the post-coital afterglow. We often just fall asleep in each other’s arms. It’s so romantic.

B) Jumps straight up, grabs her knickers and gets a mug of cocoa from the kitchen. Somehow she always manages to be fully dressed and settled just in time for Bridgerton

Mostly As. Congratulations – she not a faker! Though there’s a good chance she’s thinking of someone else. Most likely that hot IT guy at work. Don’t worry though – he’s out of her league and you’re an acceptable stunt double.

Mostly Bs. Oh dear. She’s faking just to get it over and done with. It turns out you’re not actually a skilful lover as you thought. Learn some new techniques to keep her satisfied in bed, like taking some dark chocolate HobNobs or finding a podcast she’ll like.