Capitalist oppressors furious at flukey Christmas holiday dates

EVIL capitalist oppressors are furious after discovering workers will get 10 days off at Christmas while only taking three days’ leave.

Britain’s tick-like bosses are reeling after discovering this year’s luckily-positioned Christmas bank holidays have temporarily weakened their cruel grip on the masses.

Managing director and cold-hearted scum Denys Finch Hatton said: “I hate that the fuckers have wangled this. Besides affecting my money, it gives them a dangerous sense of power.

“It could make workers rise up and demand an end to exploitation, although they might just sit at home getting pissed and eating Celebrations until they’re not really enjoying them.”

Office worker Tom Logan said: “This twist of fate really shows the ruling boss pig-dogs we won’t be pushed around.

“Now I’m going to march up to my boss with a list of demands like fair pay and free childcare. Or I might just carry on as usual and moan more.”