Facebook to crack down on fake status updates

FACEBOOK has revealed plans to stop users telling lies about themselves.

Mark Zuckerberg has promised to confront the growth in made-up stories about holidays, children and social lives, and to return Facebook to its original purpose of tracking the birthdays of casual acquaintances.

He said: “Our algorithms show that many people claiming to have just finished a 10k run were actually queueing for the morning after pill, while four-fifths of posts using the hashtag ‘blessed’ are composed while cowering under the duvet.”

Boasts about cars, brunches and exercise will be targeted, while all wedding-related posts will be accompanied by divorce rate statistics.

Facebook user Nikki Sheridan said: “I see a lot of fake posts, many of them from me.

“I just don’t know who I am any more.”

Tom Logan, from Ohio, said: “My cousins in New York keep posting the most appalling shit about shopping trips to Macy’s and exhibitions at MoMA.

“If this crackdown had happened last month I might not have voted for Donald Trump just to hurt them.”