International Women’s Day celebrated by brands that hate women

CORPORATIONS that hate and fear women have wished them a happy International Women’s Day.

Companies that sell their products by making women deeply paranoid about having fat arses and wrinkly skin have given a big ‘shout out’ to all the ‘real women out there’.

Diet company boss Nathan Muir tweeted: “Great to see women being celebrated for their awesomeness rather than just having their neuroses preyed upon for marketing purposes.

“And what better day to start shedding a few pounds so you don’t look like a munter on your beach holiday. #radicalthinspiration.”

Fashion magazine editor Emma Bradford said: “International Women’s Day is a chance for us to take a break from psychologically undermining women in the most devious manner, so that they have to ‘fix’ themselves with ‘prion-packed face cream’ and weird handbags with teddies on them.

“Also it’s cool that the day has its roots in a demonstration by Russian garment workers. Because what better way to celebrate an outpuring of radical dissent than by buying a bang-on-trend skirt from our website?

“Type ‘feminism’ in the voucher box for a 10 per cent discount.”