A MACHINE dispensing parking tickets does not give change purely because it is owned by mean-spirited scumbags.
The Institute for Studies found there was no compelling reason why the machine could not return any over-payment and was clearly the work of shits.
Professor Henry Brubaker said: “We’ve sent people into space, so I’m fairly certainly the technology exists to make small denomination coins come out of a slot.
“It’s just shameless bastardry.”
Professor Brubaker explained that people who pay for things have every right to expect the return of surplus payment.
He added: “Imagine the CEO of Parking Corp goes into a bookshop and purchases a £6.99 book, probably a manual about how to be a bigger bastard, with a tenner.
“Then they won’t give him his change because they ‘can’t’, despite having a till that is clearly full of change. He’d go apeshit and understandably so.
“But it would serve the bastard right.”
Parking Corp CEO Tom Booker said: “How those piles of pound coins gleam in the dank basement of my otherwise empty, silent mansion house.”