Racist cake orders up 2,000 per cent

SPECIALITY bakers across the country are struggling to cope with a record demand for horribly racist cakes.

'All we're doing is turning it into a cake and then cutting its head off'

The ‘blackface’ cake which has caused controversy in Sweden has proved overwhelmingly popular in England, with thousands of orders from police stations, national newspapers and nursing homes.

Baker Francesca Johnson said: “Our elderly customers call them Golliwog cakes. They want to devour one as a last act of politically incorrect defiance before death grabs them by the wrist.

“I’ve hired four new staff and tripled my order of black food colouring and giant cherry lips. We don’t have time to do the fine sculpting on the faces but it turns out the cruder and more offensive the caricature, the more people like it.”

Golf clubs and Women’s Institutes have also placed thousands of orders while the Daily Telegraph has launched a discounted reader offer as part of its campaign to make racial discrimination a bit of harmless fun like it was in the 1970s.

Meanwhile, Prince Philip has told the Buckingham Palace kitchen that if he does not get one at 4pm every afternoon someone is going to turn up dead.

Helen Archer, who ordered a cake in the shape of a dancing Zulu tribesman for her mother’s 85th birthday, said: “She’s forgotten almost everything except her racism so this will bring a huge smile to her demented face.

“The Telegraph wants to do a photo of her stabbing at it with a bayonet.”