Sunday, 8th December 2019

Wetherspoons to replace foreign beers with bags of glue

JD Wetherspoons has confirmed that it will be removing all foreign drinks from its pubs and replacing them with proper British bags of sniffing glue

The pub chain said the move would support ohe UK economy and 'stick two fingers up to unelected Eurocrats'.

A spokesman said: “Bags of glue got the nation through the ‘70s and there’s no reason they won’t get us through Brexit.

“We want our customers to remember a time when pubs were full of short-lived euphoria followed by headaches and nausea.

“We know they will get behind this. They got behind Corona, so they’ll get behind anything. We’ll probably just sell it for a quid a bag.”

Specially produced ‘sniffing glue’ has been sourced from factories in Coventry and Leeds, with the extra business set to create up to 400 jobs.