A COURT has ruled that GCHQ illegally spied on private emails but, unlike Myleene Klass, did not share them with 460,000 followers on Twitter.
The spy agency has yet to find out how it will be punished, though it is unlikely to become a playground pariah never invited to a birthday party again.
Judge Hatton said: “By monitoring and flagging for interest tens of thousands of emails without warrant, GCHQ knowingly broke the law.
“However, I accept its plea for mitigation that it did less damage to society than former Hear’Say singer Myleene Klass, who revealed private communications with blatant disregard for her childrens’ desire not to be given swirlies and Chinese burns.
“I therefore rule that GCHQ should expect to pay a fine likely to be substantial, and that Myleene Klass should be transported to Guantanamo Bay.”
Klass responded that paying £10 for a present rather than re-gifting was a matter of conscience that she had a duty to inform the British people about, and has applied to Russia for asylum.